UN DEFCON -> UN Neutrality Mandate

UN Neutrality Mandate, Whee!

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Allech-Atreus

Posted: Apr 25 2007, 09:56 PM

Arrogant Prick

Group: Members
Posts: 55
Member No.: 33
Joined: 5-September 06

This is a rehash of Kenny's Prohibition of UN Military.

UN Neutrality Mandate
A resolution to improve world security by boosting police and military budgets.

QUOTE

Category: International Security
Strength: Mild
Proposed by: Allech-Atreus

Descrption: In order to preserve the neutrality of the United Nations regarding international politics and inter-state conflicts, and to ensure the territorial sovereignty and integrity of member states;

The United Nations hereby DECLARES;

1.� That member states shall neither raise nor marshal any military forces under the UN banner;

2. That member states shall not look to the UN for law enforcement capabilities, it being in the best interest of the body to remain politically and legally neutral in the affairs of its members;

MANDATES that member states shall neither request nor expect intervention in any armed conflict by any UN-created military or police force.

STRESSES that nothing in this document shall be construed as to deny the right of member states to form military coalitions for purposes of peacekeeping, stabilization and delivering humanitarian aid in nations that request such assistance.

Any thoughts?

EDIT: Made suggested changes made, reworked preamble.

TheykilledKenny	Posted: Apr 25 2007, 10:31 PM
Bite my shiny metal ass! Group: Daleks Posts: 586 Member No.: 3 Joined: 8-February 06	You can't declare "the United Nations shall not" do anything. You have to hone the language so the actionable verbs apply to member states. All your "-ing" verbs are in the wrong context; change it to: "The United Nations hereby... "DECLARES..." ...and on down the line. I'd remove the "hereforth" from the "declaring" clause, move the "affirming" clause down to the bottom, and while I'm at it, change the "affirming" clause altogether so it focuses on the the right of nations to form coalitions for the sake of peacekeeping, stablization and delivering humanitarian aid. Something like: "Nothing in this document shall be construed as to deny the right of member states to form military coalitions for purposes of peacekeeping, stabilization and delivering humanitarian aid in nations that request such assistance." Oh, and yes. You do have my permission to use my preamble. I was thinking before of a clause to add to it, but I've lost it now. I'll let you know when it comes back to me.

Allech-Atreus

Posted: Apr 25 2007, 10:47 PM

Arrogant Prick

Group: Members
Posts: 55
Member No.: 33
Joined: 5-September 06

QUOTE (Kenny)

You can't declare "the United Nations shall not" do anything. You have to hone the language so the actionable verbs apply to member states. All your "-ing" verbs are in the wrong context; change it to:

"The United Nations hereby...

"DECLARES..."

...and on down the line.

Sure, sure. I was hoping that I could simply state that the UN was prevented from taking the action, just as it was with the taxation ban, but I suppose the style rules prevent that.

QUOTE

I'd remove the "hereforth" from the "declaring" clause, move the "affirming" clause down to the bottom, and while I'm at it, change the "affirming" clause altogether so it focuses on the the right of nations to form coalitions for the sake of peacekeeping, stablization and delivering humanitarian aid. Something like:

"Nothing in this document shall be construed as to deny the right of member states to form military coalitions for purposes of peacekeeping, stabilization and delivering humanitarian aid in nations that request such assistance."

Excellent changes, thank you.

QUOTE

Oh, and yes. You do have my permission to use my preamble.

I was thinking before of a clause to add to it, but I've lost it now. I'll let you know when it comes back to me.

D'oh, I meant to go back and reword it but I just hit post. I might change around the wording and add some new emphases.

All changes will be made to the original draft.

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