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Welcome to the UN DEFCON. We care more about your nation's security than you do.
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 The Death Star Canteen, When ya need a break from sabre rattling
Cluichstan
Posted: Mar 21 2007, 04:30 PM


International Pariah


Group: Admin
Posts: 1,500
Member No.: 1
Joined: 8-February 06



The Death Star Canteen is open for business! Feel free to grab a bite to eat or just kick back and hang out with your fellow DEFCON members!

(OOC: And y'all must check out that link! laugh.gif )
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Cluichstan
Posted: Mar 21 2007, 10:32 PM


International Pariah


Group: Admin
Posts: 1,500
Member No.: 1
Joined: 8-February 06



Off in one corner of the canteen is a bar. Archie, the bartender, sets down a small placard in front of the stool at the end of the bar that reads: "Reserved for Sheik Nottap bin Cluich." He then returns to polishing glasses.

(OOC: Bonus points to anyone who can ID where I got the name for the bartender. Here's a hint: It's reeeeeeaaaaally old, even older than Auss. wink.gif )
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Shazbotdom
Posted: Mar 22 2007, 12:11 AM


The King of Kings


Group: Members
Posts: 107
Member No.: 7
Joined: 10-February 06



OOC:
Well. Back in the day there were several characters named Archie. I mean there was one on Happy Days for a while, then there was Archie Bunker. So yeah. Don't know what one your actually talking about there.
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HoratioSulla
Posted: Mar 22 2007, 10:41 AM


Kicker of Arse, and taker of names


Group: Daleks
Posts: 419
Member No.: 4
Joined: 9-February 06



OOC:Archie is what Anti-Aircraft was called by piolts during the First World War...learned that from playing Dawn Patrol by TRS many, many years ago.
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Cluichstan
Posted: Mar 22 2007, 11:03 AM


International Pariah


Group: Admin
Posts: 1,500
Member No.: 1
Joined: 8-February 06



(OOC: Nope and nope. And please, folks, if you're going to post something OOC here, at least include some IC stuff.)

Commander Nikrat bin Cluich strides stiffly into the canteen, picks up a tray and wipes it with the sleeve of his uniform, mumbling bitterly to himself about "bloody wet trays."

Nikrat heads to the counter and sets his tray down. "I'll have the penne arrabiata," he says. "And inform the chef that if he stuffs the pasta tubes with peas again, I'll have him ground up in one of the trash compactors."
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Ithania
Posted: Mar 22 2007, 12:22 PM


Submissive Pseudo-vampire


Group: Members
Posts: 33
Member No.: 46
Joined: 21-March 07



Chief Negotiator Doranda Asura staggers in to the bar, her OCD polished heels lazily swinging in one hand and a Taser firmly clenched in the other. Silent curses about shuttle lag breathed out as she flops on to the counter.

ďI need something, anything, I donít care what. Just wake me upĒ whimpers out, eyelids struggling to stay open.

(OOC: Youíll have to forgive me, Iíve never had much experience with RP so it might take a while to get into the spirit of things. smile.gif )
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Cluichstan
Posted: Mar 22 2007, 01:18 PM


International Pariah


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Posts: 1,500
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Joined: 8-February 06



Commander Nikrat turns to the new arrival in the canteen. "Ah, Miss Asura, is it? From Ithania?" he says politely. "Permit me to introduce myself: Sheik Nikrat bin Cluich, at your service. I command this battlestation."

He gives a slight bow and continues. "I'd been told you would be arriving soon. I do hope your trip here wasn't too uncomfortable. I'm afraid the usual diplomatic shuttles were tied up, and I know full well how spartan our military craft can be."

The commander sees from her demeanor that Doranda's trip to the Death Star had not, in fact, gone well. "Might I suggest trying the coffee?" he offers. "I've ordered the staff here in the canteen to make sure that it's quite strong. The last time it wasn't, I had one of the staff thrown out of a maintenance airlock. Nothing like setting an example, you know."


(OOC: Don't worry about it, Ithania. I'm sure you'll pick it up rather quickly. smile.gif )
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TheykilledKenny
Posted: Mar 22 2007, 10:27 PM


Bite my shiny metal ass!


Group: Daleks
Posts: 586
Member No.: 3
Joined: 8-February 06



Just then, two very familiar faces appeared at the entrance to the canteen, one belonging to a certain young man (if you want to call 39 "young") who hadn't been seen in months, and looked surprisingly good without his clothes on -- if the sheik's claims of his recent Internet fame were to be believed. Today, however, he was fully dressed, in a decidedly nicer suit than the one UN regulars always used to see on him, cleanly pressed this time, though his collar was undone and his Elmer Fudd necktie comfortably loosened as per usual. He wore an expression of childlike amusement.

"Oh, man!" he trumpeted. "I can't believe we have a fuckin' Death Star, man!"

"Wow," Cdr. Chiang replied sagely. "It has been awhile since you've been to the UN, hasn't it?"

As the twain approached the bar, Riley appreciated his new surroundings with amazement. "This is fuckin' awesome!" he told his comrade, gazing about with all the excitation of a schoolboy.

"What'll you have, Mr. Undersecretary?" Chiang asked as they stood before the counter.

"Man, I don't even know," he replied happily. "What do they drink on a fuckin' Death Star?!"

"Why don't you try a Hairy Wookiee?" offered the commander.

"Yeah, sure! I'll have that!" Riley told Archie.

"And I'll have some Jameson on ice," Chiang said as she pulled up a barstool.

Riley, meanwhile, was still taking in all the astonishment of being inside a fuckin' Death Star, as he started to amuse himself with a familiar meme: "Death Star ... Death Star ... Death Star ... Death Star ... Did I mention we have a fuckin' Death Star??!!"

"OK, Riley's getting a little overexcited," Chiang whispered to one of her officers. "Give him the usual."

Breezily the commando produced a taser and closed in on the diplomat, angrily stunning him in the side: "Death Star--AUGH!!!!"

The man grabbed his side, groaning in pain. "Jesus," he exclaimed, "that felt great! ... Just how I like it, baby. Do it again!"

*zap!* "Ahhh! ... Yeah, right there! ..." *zap!!* "Owwww, fuck! ... Maybe a little lower ..." *zap!!* "AUGHHHH!!!! ... Yeah, that's good."

"On second thought, just knock him out," Chiang eventually said. Compliantly the woman slammed the tail end of the taser into the back of Riley's skull, and he collapsed to the floor with a swift thud.

"That'll be all, Lieutenant," the commander said as she sat back down, winking at a pair of burly men with lit cigarettes she'd eyed lingering in a shadowy corner. CPESL brass-knuckle guys, most likely.

[CLUICH EDIT: The Star Wars geek in me had to fix the spelling of "Wookiee." Sorry, couldn't help myself. wink.gif]

[KENNYEDIT: Bah. The Web site misspelled it. It's the Web site's fault! ausser.gif]
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Cluichstan
Posted: Mar 22 2007, 10:43 PM


International Pariah


Group: Admin
Posts: 1,500
Member No.: 1
Joined: 8-February 06



The two burly men that Cdr. Chiang had spotted step forward and grab Riley, one each taking an arm and pulling him from the canteen. "Can you believe he actually walked right in here, Vinny?"

"Hell no, Rocco! I didn't think even a Kennyite'd be dat stoopid."

"Well, it looks like da boss'll finally get her money outta him."

"Yeah, dat or he'll be Dianoga food."

The two men laugh heartily as they pull Riley out of the canteen.
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The Wolf Guardians
Posted: Mar 23 2007, 12:07 AM


NCO


Group: Members
Posts: 28
Member No.: 35
Joined: 1-October 06



OOC: LMAO! That clip was GREAT!

IC: A tiny Guardian pup in a suit, identifiable as Kyle to those of the UN, walked into the bar and hopped up to a stool. "Could I have a chocolate milk?"
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Shazbotdom
Posted: Mar 23 2007, 12:30 AM


The King of Kings


Group: Members
Posts: 107
Member No.: 7
Joined: 10-February 06



IC:
The door swung open and the deligate from Shazbotdom walked in. Rarely does he leave his office but he decided that he should make some rounds in the building. He walked over to a corner and sat down, reading the latest reports that were sent via satelite straight from the Dark Empire herself.





OOC:
So. Is "Archie" from that old show? I forget the name but the father's name is Archie Bunker. Would that be where you got the name from?
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The Wolf Guardians
Posted: Mar 23 2007, 12:35 AM


NCO


Group: Members
Posts: 28
Member No.: 35
Joined: 1-October 06



OOC: "All in the Family." And... er... we aren't in the UN building... are we? I thought we were aboard the Death Star.

Doing as children do and mimicking the newcomer, Kyle pulled out his PDA and began reading everything Wolfgang told him to for his new job, while idly sipping his chocolate milk. This was going to be WAY more fun than regular diplomatics classes.
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TheykilledKenny
Posted: Mar 23 2007, 12:42 AM


Bite my shiny metal ass!


Group: Daleks
Posts: 586
Member No.: 3
Joined: 8-February 06



[OOC: You thought right, CWG.]

"Commander?! You're just gonna let the CPESL drag off the undersecretary like that?"

"Meh. It's not like it doesn't happen often."

"Is that the only reason you brought him here?"

"Not really. Not in retrospect. I was really more concerned with taking the heat off the Destructor. ... I could have smoothed things over with them by making a few calls to some recycling plants to send over the requisite number of empty beer cans -- but you know how difficult it's been dealing with the Cluichstanis ever since they iced their ambassador! Listen, don't worry about Riley, Lieutenant. A few weeks in the hospital and he'll be good as new."

"What do we do in the meantime, Commander?"

"I don't know. We can jumpstart diplomacy with the sheiks later. But for now, here, no one's touched Riley's drink yet. Be a shame to let all that liquor go to waste. Then get ready for a few dances. This place could use some entertainment."
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Shazbotdom
Posted: Mar 23 2007, 12:43 AM


The King of Kings


Group: Members
Posts: 107
Member No.: 7
Joined: 10-February 06



QUOTE (The Wolf Guardians @ Mar 22 2007, 11:35 PM)
OOC: "All in the Family." And... er... we aren't in the UN building... are we? I thought we were aboard the Death Star.

Doing as children do and mimicking the newcomer, Kyle pulled out his PDA and began reading everything Wolfgang told him to for his new job, while idly sipping his chocolate milk. This was going to be WAY more fun than regular diplomatics classes.

OOC:
No. Were about the Death Star. I call my guy the Deligate to the UN DEFCON. Although I am in the UN as well. This guy I havent thought up a name for...although I change the name for my UN Deligate too. I should just pick names and put them in a file somewhere....



IC:
After reading the report. The deligate got up and walked over to the bar and ordered two scotches, chugged the first one and then walked back to his seat with the second.
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The Wolf Guardians
Posted: Mar 23 2007, 12:51 AM


NCO


Group: Members
Posts: 28
Member No.: 35
Joined: 1-October 06



OOC: I could've sworn that UNDEFCON actually met aboard the Death Star. Hmm... You've shaken the foundation of my soul, you! tongue.gif

Oh, and it's "delegate." [/GrammarNazi]

WOLFEDIT: That's what I get for reading things backwards. Kenny says we ARE on the Death Star! Don't y'all (I'm entitled to that word, I'm from Missouri) toy with me like that!
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