NEWS

[Sofia Giovanni]

JEREMY,

It's been a while since I've seen you! How have you been? What have you been doing? Have you been staying safe, keeping your nose clean? Why haven't you written me in so long?

You know what? I'll stop asking so many questions.

Aaaanyway. I've been planning to go to England for the longest time. Well, more recently than anything. Um. The thing is, Josiah and I - well, I mean I... I miss him so much. You remember him, right? I think you would. Well anyway, um, I wanted to surprise him. So that means I can't ask him to come and pick me up.

Would you do me the biggest favor in the world and come get me? I would love you forever and ever.

Seriously. For-Eh-Ver.

SOFIA

[Jeremy Thacker]

Dearest Sof,

As a janitor, my nose is never clean. Silly girl, you should know that. But yes, I'm quite safe from the dust-bunnies and the various vicious monsters that live in the toilets. As to the having written thing, well...gotta keep the place sparkling you know? Can't have my Chancellor walking about on dirty floors. No, no. Gotta make them waxy and shiny. Problem is...they get very slippery. I hope he doesn't have an accident!

I did wax so many of the floors. All ready three people have been sent to the nurse. Oops.

A trip to Italy you say? Come get you, you say? And yes, I remember this Josie Josiah of yours. If it means that much and that I get some of your wonderful pizza (and fish n' chips from Mr. Halibut's next door then by all means I shall come collect you. I have a bit of vacation time coming to me.

I'll pop down and we'll take a nice ride up. You just give me the word when you're ready. I'll request the time off tomorrow but it takes a few days to go through. I seem to be the only janitor who feels like working some times!

Jeremy

[Sofia Giovanni]

JEREMY

Well yes, but you know what I meant! Haha! I'm glad to hear that you're doing alright. And I agree - we can't have our Chancellor walking on dirty floors. Of course you would think that someone could wave a wand and make them stay clean on their own. But whatever. It's nice to know that at least somebody - namely you - values good old fashion manual labor.

I hope the Chancellor slips and dies a painful death. Nope. We wouldn't want anyone else to get hurt.

Haha, of course! I'll make you the biggest most delicious pizza you've ever had in your entire life. Just come down here, maybe we could hang out a little while, then take me back up to England. It'll be so much fun, I promise.

I'm ready whenever you are, really. Just ask off for the soonest date you can, and let me know. I'm flexible like that.

SOFIA

[Jeremy Thacker]

Sofiadarling,

The labor is worth it. Flicking a wand about (while tempting) only gets the floor a so-so shiny. I wanted a mega diamond shine! But as I said, the mega diamond shine seems to have caused some problems. I had to bluff and say I accidentally ordered Extra Strength Rainbow Turtle Wax Brand Floor Wax as opposed to the knock off brand which is significantly less strengthy and rainboy turtely.

After said incidents of people slipping (the highest up person was Gencia Adams and kept to my little janitor cubbies lest she decide to take revenge) I daresay the place was anxious to get rid of me for awhile so my vacation time was granted. Two weeks of nothing but the lovely you.

Well, the lovely you and my father and mother. Possibly aunt, uncle and cousins. They'll DEMAND I stop by. Please come with me. My mother is a conclusion jumper and I don't want her bothering me about dates or girlfriends. If you're there she'll just smile smarmily.

I'll be popping down at the end of this week. Saturday, probably about lunchish? Think you can do something about that? I'm sure I'll be terribly hungry.

Jeremy

[Sofia Giovanni]

JEREMY

Oh I see! So manual labor does prove to be better than magic. I knew it. And what is this Extra Strength something-to-do-with-a-colorful-turtle Wax? It sounds awfully... shiny. And, apparently, dangerous. Good plan.

Two weeks? Oh that's just lovely! We will have so much fun together, just you wait. You'll have all the pizza, fish 'n chips, and friendly fun you can stand!

Of course, of course. I'll go with you. Your parents - and the rest of your family - are adorable, really. They visit the Palace every so often, always talking about you. Especially your mother. Goodness. I know what you mean.

Ooooh I'm so excited! I can barely contain myself!

SOFIA

[Jeremy Thacker]

Sofia-bo-bia

Goodness. Running out of clever names.

Anyway! Thank you for your compliment on the wax. I did think it was rather brilliant. It's about Thursday now and I've sent my things ahead of me. My family should be all set. I cannot wait to see you.

And we shall not spend the entire time in the city while I'm there, oh no. I plan to take you out for a picnic and a swim. My cousins will probably tag a long. One would think that since they are in their late teens, they wouldn't want to spend time with their fuddy-duddy uncle. (Guess that's not the case.)

The time is almost upon us!

To Saturday!

Jeremy

[Sofia Giovanni]

JEREMY DEAREST

Oh don't worry about the nicknames. I'm sure you will think of more when you come down and see me again. And they'll be more awesome, I'm sure.

I'm so glad we kept writing this entire time. It probably would have felt soooo much longer if we hadn't. OH. And your mother stopped by. Again. She's so excited, I can barely stand her it. Haha.

Not to seem egotistical or narcissistic or anything, but I'm pretty sure your late-teen cousins are more excited about who their fuddy-duddy uncle is spending time with than actually spending time with their fuddy-duddy uncle. Just saying. After all, I do make the best pizza in Italy. Well. Me and Raphael. It's true. People say it all the time.

SOFIA

[Jeremy Thacker]

Sofiebanana

Sorry about my mother. I'll send her an owl after you come back saying I "broke up" with you for some totally selfish reason or another. That way when she sees you after you return she'll probably curse me for being a dunce and give you an apology cake.

What's your favorite flavor? I'll make sure to put that in the note.

I suppose you're right. Lia and Risa are "starved" for company or some nonsense. You can all three be girly together. Woe is me to be manishly outnumbered. I will concede that you do make the most fantastic of pizzas.

One last thing dear girl.

Turn around. (Merlin I hope I time this right.)

Jeremy