David Greenspan walks up to the podium and begins his speech:

Fellow Confundians (audience applause), thank you (more applause), thank you (starts to quiet enough to talk)


It is very exciting to come back to my alma-mater. I have many friends, colleagues and supporters here, there are those who are as close as family here.

I'm a big believer in the value of education. Our education system produces talent, gets people into useful jobs and makes them knowledgeable and productive citizens. The Conservatives are the first party to announce a policy on research and education. We think its the best one. We are going to increase research funding and education funding in order to stimulate the economy, gain technological leadership in the world, and ensure all talented individuals have the opportunity to access education and become productive citizens in society.

I'll admit we'll have less money to distribute than parties like Big Brother that believe in stealing the wealth away from everyone to pay for what they want. But we will manage it better, and we won't be stealing from you to get it. A fair taxation structure will ensure that you'll be able to gain the benefits of the hard work you've put into your education.

I promise you that if elected the FCP will work long for an increase in research funding and for an increase in education funding. These two measures will boost the economy, increase jobs, increase new companies and provide ample investment opportunities for all of Confundia.

I thank you all for your time. I ask that each and every one of you comes out and votes during the election. Remember we are THE "RIGHT" PARTY (a sizable portion of the audience joins in on the last 3 words).