It was Christmas time once again in the year, and the Joker was sat in his warehouse, surrounded by goons and henchmen, none of whom had batted any more than an eyelid after the events that had just unfolded with his Harls. It wasn’t something they were un-accustomed to, and those that were new and saw the treatment at least had the smarts in them to keep their goddamned mouths shut about it. Those that came to work for the “super-sane” clown weren’t all idiots and they knew that he seemed to suffer from mood swings which would leave him to flip out over things that would seem to be quite small and insignificant like decorating the warehouse to be Christmas-themed.

But it wasn’t a small, insignificant little thing that Harley did, not at all. First of all, look at the lights in the place. The hideout was supposed to be something inconspicuous, something hidden from people to stop the GCPD swarming all over them to ship the clown back off to Arkham again. It was bad enough with the increased electrical activity in the warehouse that someone would eventually discover (but by the time they suspect anything, the hideout would have been re-located to another place, something that his goons didn’t understand) but to have flashing coloured lights all over the place was just stupid. It’s essentially like having a huge sign outside going “HI BATMAN, THERE’S A KILLER CLOWN IN HERE!” Then there was the tackiness of the whole thing, I mean come on! Who wants to be surrounded by a bunch of plastic Santas and a big fucking Christmas tree covered in tinsel and other stupid crap? This whole holiday was only good for one thing and that was the opportunity it presented for the Joker to really cause some damage, such as the Santa massacre he had planned for the next day. He had located a nearby Santa who was doing work the day after Christmas had passed and the Joker couldn’t resist such a tempting opportunity. He had been far too lax in his attempts to cripple Gotham in the run-up to Christmas, he needed to capitalise on the opportunity as soon as possible and the day seemed to be on Boxing Day this year. He didn’t have the time or the patience in his current state to be dealing with talking to Harley about the idiocy of her actions regarding the decorating of the lair, so he simply beat the understanding into her. With any luck, she’ll remember this for next year, but somehow the Joker didn’t bank on it. The little idiot was always forgetting her lessons meaning that the clown had to constantly remind her, and since it had been a while since he last mass-murder, he was getting a little edgy, which explains why he may have gone a little overboard on Harley.

After the beating he had gone to blow off some steam by locating a cripple and pumping too much voltage into their body via his hand-buzzer and he had the added bonus of this being an elderly cripple who was on her way to meet her family and decided that she would be safe roaming the streets in her electric wheelchair. That was an obvious mistake and one she would not be making again, mainly because she was now char grilled. But when he came back, the Joker noticed the lack of Harley in the warehouse. It wasn’t surprising to the clown, he wasn’t quite as mentally unhinged as was often thought of him, he took notice of things and he knew that when his... Associated showed the barley visible signs of thinking he went too far, Harley always disappeared somewhere. One of these days he would follow her wherever she went, but now he had more important things to do.

He wasn’t completely satisfied with the killing of the cripple, but it was like a sex-starved nympho getting a blow job the day before he was due to attend a gangbang – it was enough to bring his mood back up to a more chipper level, getting some relief and knowing that the best was so close he could almost jizz early. So when he got back into his warehouse he found his TV and decided to put his feet up – he had his miniature dwarf henchmen on order, due to arrive within the next few hours, and his other goons were attaching the components to the toys he would be handing out so that they shot out his venom, his costume was all ready and waiting, the padding all prepped and ready to go, so there was really nothing to do now but relax until the morning of Boxing Day, so why not see what Christmas movies were on?

As luck would have it – a luck that would be realised by the end of the film – the choice on TV was The Wizard of Oz with Judy Garland. Such a feel good movie and as the Joker watched on, he was feeling his creative juices churning in ways to make this family film much more twisted and sinister and a stirring inside of him which only came about when he was on the path to creating something abysmally evil and possibly something to finally prove the Batman’s lack of sanity.

Orders were screamed out to his henchmen who were standing guard and he was soon equipped with a small table, pen and his notepad where all his nefarious ideas started as rough musings. The basic components needed to be kept the same, he needed the full cast of characters in order to make this work. Dorothy and her little bitch-dog Toto. The Scarecrow, Tin Man and the Lion needed to be there with the elements of heart, brain and courage. He needed a good witch and an evil witch too, maybe even someone disposable that he could drop a house onto right at the start of his adventure... He needed the Munchkins, the people of the Emerald City and the Wizard himself. There were lots of workings out to do, a lot of plotting and planning and he needed a location where all of this could be set too. Endless possibilities presented themselves to the Joker and he wrote each and every single one of them down and he would need to pick them apart later. He would have to speak to Harls about this one too, see what she thought would be the best ideas and then rule them out as they would undoubtedly fail.

Ooh, this one was going to be devilishly delicious!